Today

Today was just another day. I woke up, I stretched, and then I remembered how my son died. I decided today I had to do something, one thing everyday.

I went to work, that was one thing, but not one extra thing so I called to get the police reports on what had happened. On the third call I got a nice lady who told me the investigation was still pending...whatever that means, the officer is working so I'm sure he's not too worried.

Then I decided to go withdraw from school. My books are sitting here, I've moved them around some, but I certainly haven't done anything about them. I should withdraw so at least I don't have an "F" on my record. I haven't had an "F" since highschool and I wasn't paying for my education then. I just don't care. I want to care, I try to care....I just don't.

So I go to the school to withdraw and she thinks my reasons are valid but there are forms to fill out. Ok. I'm ok, I can do this, I fill out her forms. 

Then she hands me ONE FINAL PAPER. This is the one where I explain why I'm withdrawing, and it asks for proof. I ask "Do they want my son's death certificate, I don't know where to get that, do you?" She gives me a website. Oh My Lord...it's got ancestry in it's address. I say "He died two weeks ago", she gives me the address to the Wisconsin court house.......he lived in New Mexico.

She says, "An Obituary will work." I say, "I don't even know if he had one. I'll look. I hope my ex didn't list my name as 'unknown'." Ha. Ha.

I came home and looked it up....jokes on me. I wasn't listed at all. My son was motherless.